Knitting for Dorky Boys

This Christmas, I decided to use my burgeoning knitting skills to outfit my friends with awesome. And among my friends are really really dorky boys. Boys so dorky, a mere scarf would not do. And I was too lazy to make too many mittens. No, these boy demanded much much dorkier presents.

The inspiration came when digging through my stash for scrap yarn and finding this ancient forest green acrylic of dubious texture. It was too itchy for anything wearable, but just about creepy looking enough to recreate one of my friend Max's most feared and revered mythological figures, great Cthulhu.

Awesome, I thought, and I searched far and wide for appropriate free internet Cthulhu patterns, of which there are many. But, I found that none of them really had satisfactory legs, and when I really thought about it, I couldn't remember what Cthulhu's legs looked like. Did he have legs? Were they just more tentacles?

Also, knitting legs is hard. And so are wings! Screw that! So, I got a little more creative. A trip to the Salvation Army yielded this lovely faux gold angel stocking holder.

So I made a few alterations.

And thus, the manteltop Cthulhu idol was born!
Behold its adorable tentacles and angry eyebrows!
Tremble at the hasty inscription on its base!

Feeling pretty cocky, I asked another friend to name anything and I would knit it for him. He requested a weapon. Oops. That's what I get for befriending black belts.
I decided a lasso would be cheating and that's not so much a weapon as an interrogation technique. And there are already enough gun cozies out there.

So, I knit him nunchucks!
They make him happy. And they have little pom-poms on the end, which makes me happy!
After all, what are nun-chucks without pom-poms?

These were actually pretty easy - it's just two rectangles with i-cord connecting them, knit in one piece and seamed, but don't tell Russell.

You don't want to mess with a man with knit nunchucks.


Michael said…
To answer your question, nunchucks without pom-poms are dignified.

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